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How Men Can Empower Women in the Bedroom

26 Mar 2024

Mutual satisfaction in the bedroom is key, and that journey isn’t always about pleasure. Intimacy, consent, and communication are all factors that can work towards empowering women in the bedroom, creating a bond that surpasses physical intimacy. In honor of Women’s History Month, let’s look at how men can help create a safe and empowering space for women in the bedroom, enhancing both parties' pleasure and overall satisfaction. After all, there’s nothing sexier than a strong woman, right?

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Communication is key

halftone lips

The assumption is the enemy when it comes to getting intimate, but being vocal about sex can be difficult. To figure out what someone likes, it’s better to be straightforward and ask rather than playing a guessing game or trying something that might turn you on but not your partner. 

Being able to communicate about these matters openly will create a new level of trust between both parties and allow you to feel more comfortable discussing desires, boundaries, and fantasies that you may have otherwise hidden away. Allowing room for an ongoing dialogue will assure greater fulfillment and satisfaction in the bedroom. It will also help you understand your needs and preferences more.

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Couple staring into each others eyes

Prioritizing consent and respect

A foundation of consent and respect is essential in fostering women's empowerment sexually, whether it’s with your standard vanilla missionary or something a little kinkier like BDSM. Boundaries are healthy in many areas of a relationship, and both stating those boundaries and being heard can create a safer, more trusting environment that enhances connection. Creating a safe word for any sexual scenario can be a helpful resource.

Enthusiastic consent, which is voluntary consent that actively shows excitement instead of just nodding along, ensures that each person is happy to take part in the encounter. To properly understand consent during foreplay and intercourse, people can practice active listening, which involves paying close attention to both verbal and non-verbal cues such as body language.

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Focusing on mutual pleasure

Instead of thinking about mutual pleasure, many of our minds often go straight towards a performance-oriented mindset when it comes to sex. Men worry: will I be able to get an erection or am I going to cum too quickly? Women wonder: will it take me too long to reach orgasm? Empowering women during sex means not just focusing on getting a positive result, but shifting your mindset to mutual pleasure without all the pressure.

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Explore different erogenous zones and varied stimulation with toys. This can also help you discover what turns you or your partner on. Consider adding accessories like an arousal gel to amplify sensations or using a vibrator, which can wake up erogenous zones like the clitoris, labia, nipples, and perineum. There are also plenty of toys for couples to use together and reach simultaneous orgasms, like wearable vibrators for her and vibrating cock rings for him.

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Embracing emotional harmony

Intimacy doesn’t end when you leave the bedroom. Instead, think of all the activities you do outside of sex as long-term foreplay. Emotional intimacy can be built by:

  • Listening to their needs via their love language
  • Planning special dates
  • Consistently checking in and listening to needs/desires
  • Engaging in holding hands, cuddling, or other affectionate behaviors they enjoy
  • Allowing yourself to be vulnerable with them
  • Writing them notes or sending them spontaneous sweet or sexy texts
  • Complimenting them

Doing any or all of these things will enhance the overall quality of the sexual experience tenfold and can increase trust and shared vulnerability, which has benefits both in and out of the bedroom. If you’re looking for something to implement directly after sex, consider practicing aftercare, which is a form of taking care of your partner after sex. Maybe that’s getting them a glass of water, cuddling, giving them a massage, or running them a bath. Make sure each of you communicates what you need after sex to feel relaxed and safe. This can help increase emotional safety and security between the two of you and make sex even better.

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Woman laying on man in bed

Encouraging exploration

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It’s easy to get stuck in a routine or to get nervous about trying new things. But remaining curious and willing to try new things together can increase fulfillment, and a great way to do that is by using sex toys for women, men, or non-binary people.

When exploring with toys or new acts, be sure to communicate that adding something new is for the sake of the other person’s enjoyment rather than fulfilling your own kink or bringing in the instant pressure to orgasm. Pleasure is about the journey, not the destination, and understanding this gets you bonus points in grasping the essence of women's empowerment.

This creates an atmosphere of liberation not just for women but for both partners. It turns the relationship into a non-judgemental sanctuary for expressing desires and fantasies rather than repressing them out of embarrassment or fear of not being listened to. This will develop even closer intimacy and connection, ensuring you can share a full range of thoughts and feelings with your partner without thinking twice. 

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Recognizing and celebrating individuality

What gets one person off won’t necessarily get another person off. One woman might prefer pinpoint sensations, while another might enjoy a fuller, broader stimulation of the vulva with a toy like a wand. Our bodies are incredibly unique, and that’s something to appreciate and celebrate rather than be frustrated by. It can be an exciting process to find out what makes your partner scream with satisfaction. It’s also a validating experience to be listened to when expressing likes and dislikes.

Try to approach each encounter with curiosity and avoid stereotypes. Instead, embrace individual preferences without judgment. There’s a kaleidoscope of desire out there. Maybe foreplay alone can bring someone to orgasm instead of penetrative sex, or perhaps nipple play is what really makes someone explode. Either way, you’ll only ever know if you nurture communication with your partner to ensure everyone is comfortable and feels free to say what they think and feel. All these factors can help with empowering women in the bedroom.

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